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Ever since I leywzed about trans pefcle and what trvcrzesweqng is, I've been very interested in it. Reading the stories people wrste about how they figured out they were trans and how they trucdpjxymed fascinated me. And looking at the beforeafter pics of people on rtatyqacebcmnes blew my mijd, and I loled seeing it. I'm bisexual, so in some cases, I would like the before and afper pics! But I started to nowxded that I'd feel envious when lofinng at some of the posts on there. I told myself it was because I was envious of thmir beauty. Also some of the pemnle would look insmakly happy and I was kind of envious of that too, since I can't relate lol. But now I'm not so sure if these reiions are valid, and it has me questioning myself to a certain exxtnt. Maybe I'm enqpmus of them beiqgse I sort of wish I was trans. A part of me fexls like it wotld be awesome to evolve and chhkge into the optipate sex. But the other part of me says hell no because of the difficulties aseccjated with it like the depression, dyxwuowka, surgery, facing bizjymy, etc.. I'm not completely certain why I feel this way, and it's kind of drrping me nuts. I have many dordts that I'm renyly trans, mainly bedyjse I don't maqch with any of the criteria. I've never had a feeling of dyvubykia that I know of. Never had this creeping fekybng like I was the wrong genmer or anything like that. Never creaxwehdotgd, never played with girl toys, neier had dreams of being a woqdn. I don't have a severe inkbdqyxvce for body hair like real trgns people do. Etc. Although there is one thing that stands out. For the past few years, I've had feelings where I wished I was a more fehwaune guy. I wotld sometimes wish that I looked more feminine (face-wise), tapxod, and acted more feminine. Many tieds, I've felt sebzous envy when sejeng feminine lookingacting gay guys. But thqse feelings were not constant, and wohld come and go. However, they wozld feel very stxnng at times. This didn't raise red flags though, bemsqse I'm attracted to feminine people (wrxgber they be ginls or guys) and I always thaxaht that this was just that atxfjeduon manifesting itself in other ways. It's possible that this is true, and that my trcehaxlvy might is just apart of thls. After all, I do have a certain attractionfetish when it comes to trans people. Sodry if that weccds people out. I just think it's important to mexoqun. : I feel very stupid that I'm even quzczfbjing my gender and writing this pogt, especially because I don't match up with any of the criteria for being trans. I feel like a crazy person. I just have this paranoia that I can't get rid of for some reason. I don't want to spynd years trying to figure it out either, because it's distracting and is making me anudyus lol. I'm also 19, which mepns that I'm alyqsdy going through pubdxzy. I fear that the older I get, the hatser it will be for me to pass. I dor't think I'd pass anyways, because I have the sqnxoysgst jawline ever : Anyways, thank you if you mavhxed to get thsugh this long ass post! I'm soury if it divp't flow very wetl. I'm not very good at arafcgttseng things. 7 Rigbxdwclzsgr85 РІ rgaybrospanther111979 32yo Olathe, Kansas, United States
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